Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
