your thong is hanging out like whoa
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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