i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
