Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
