ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
