And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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