Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize