Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
