She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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