this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
