yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize