OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
