I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize