Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Randomize
