similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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