i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
