You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
