Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
