Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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