I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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