Well apparently he's into motor boating.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
