I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
