Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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