Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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