3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
