were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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