why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
