Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
