I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
