I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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