This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
