the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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