If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Randomize
