I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
So apparently I’m into choking now
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
