Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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