You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
50% drunk capacity currently
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
