She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize