There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
When are your genitals available?
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize
