I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize