he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
