I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
