she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
you had me at cake vodka
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Randomize
