Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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