I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
