the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
