this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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