did you get engaged???
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
