I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
