I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
