Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
